Sunday, November 13, 2011

Things you probably don't know about me

  • I have way more confidence in myself than any person should.  This used to not be the case.  I think the change happened when I went backpacking in South America for a summer.
  • However, despite my unhealthy amount of self confidence, I'm extremely self-conscious about the size of my ass (it's huge).
  • I recognize that I have some very over-calibrated defense mechanisms and generally don't let people get to know me.  I very rarely give people straight answers when asked a direct and prying question.  I don't know why I do that.
  • I do, however, react well when someone shows a genuine interest in getting to know me on a personal level.
  • I was (am) really slow to mature.  People always guess that I'm significantly younger than I am.
  • I have a pretty strong chameleon personality in order to keep people from extrapolating things about me based on my behavior.  If you want to get to know me, the first step is you need to isolate me from the group, otherwise I'm just acting, adapting, and manipulating social situations and you'll never get anything concrete out of me.  I do it for fun.
  • I can lie on a lie detector test.
  • I'm usually pretty direct with people and I appreciate when people are direct with me.
  • I don't ask questions unless I'm prepared for all the possible answers.
  • When I don't sleep, I act like I'm high.  People usually leave you alone when you're high.
  • When I'm in the library, I always wear headphones.  I'm never listening to any music.  Wearing headphones is just the universal sign for "Leave me alone".
  • I'm currently on 5 different medications designed to make me fall asleep - one to trigger sleep waves in my brain, one to separate communication between the two hemispheres of the brain (to make me stop thinking about stuff), one to relax and dull my nerves, one to just make me feel drowsy in general, and a mood stabilizer to keep all the others from messing me up.
  • Even with all that medicine, I still have trouble falling asleep.
  • I'm absolutely terrified of falling in love again.
  • I prefer to sleep alone.
  • I sleep with a knife under my pillow.
  • I'm attracted to girls with piercings and tattoos.
  • I love girls that wear huge reflective sunglasses
  • I hate New Year's Eve.
  • I don't really have a "type" when it comes to dating.  The only common theme seems to be if they make me laugh (and even then...).  I've dated ugly girls and hot girls, fat girls and skinny girls.  I've dated perfect Christian girls and I've dated girls who are currently in prison for 1st degree murder. I've dated girls that were 100% country with boots, hats and horses, and I've dated girls that were 100% punk rock with piercings and tattoos and bright pink hair.
  • I often give people genuine compliments but they think I'm being sarcastic.  I don't know if that means that I'm really good at being sarcastic, or really bad at giving compliments.
  • I play my piano for at least an hour every day, often playing the same songs (or parts of songs) over and over and over.
  • I'm very quick to sever ties with friends.  It's rare that I'll keep in contact with people once they're physically out of my life.
  • I'm a chick flick kind of guy.
  • I always cheer out loud when the guy gets the girl.
  • I used to not be funny, so I decided to study what makes people laugh and all the different ways to do that.  Now I do stand-up comedy.
  • My skill in humor is so broad that a lot of people often tell me that "no one else understands 'our humor'".
  • I love sitting and listening to people talk about themselves.
  • I also love watching people interact with each other.
  • I get more nervous talking to a girl that I like than I do when I speak in front of a crowd of thousands of people.
  • Girls often think I care about them way more than I actually do.  This is because when I was younger, I never did the casual dating thing.  Between the ages of 15 and 21, I probably spent the equivalent of 1 month without a girlfriend, so being in a relationship is what I'm really really good at.
  • I purposefully create awkward moments for people.
  • I'm extremely determined and almost always get what I want - even if I have to wait several years.
  • I'm freakishly good at learning people - learning what motivates them, what makes them tick, and predicting their behavior in almost all situations.  I can plan conversations that I'll have with people way ahead of time because I already know what they're going to say.
  • My heart jumps every time I get a text message.
  • I'm always plotting my next move.
  • I often yell things as loud as I can and sound angry.  I'm not.  I just think it's hilarious to ask someone how their day was at full volume, or shout "WHAT!?!" when they knock on my door.
  • Amusing myself is my biggest motivator.
  • I write a lot of songs, but I've never finished one.


  1. wow, reading this post makes me think that I already know you personally. I once try to describe myself on my own blog but I can't. I don't know why. : )

  2. "I always cheer out loud when the guy gets the girl." -Watch Gossip Girl. No really. Your head will explode with all of the retracted cheering.